Why hello there my dears. Guess what? It is 5:52 am and I just woke up at 5:30 am to get ready for school. And after today I have a week off for Spring Break. W00T! >o<

SO, I woke up this morning with my nose bleeding. Not a tiny nose bleed, oh no. Blood was running down my mouth almost to my chin. O_o It's always creepy when you have freaky dreams and then wake with a nose bleed. >_> And this was one of the weirdest dreams I've ever had. That's what I get for looking up ex-Deviant SnapeSnogger/OwlGem's art work and reading up EVERYTHING on her on EncyclopediaDramatica before going to bed.... I REALLY could have done without the disturbing naga mpreg dream. D; Mpreg is fine, but her angry naga pics scare the living SHIT out of me. >_< It's the angry faces. And of course my dreams were haunted by the lack of any noses and the fact that most of her males look like someone attached a chibi head onto a normal human body. XD Hahaha I don't hate SnapeSnogger's art work, I actually love a lot of it (The HP stuff) but the naga pr0nz and stuff just... NO. Yaoi is fine, but not naga stuff drawn in that art style. It makes you go WTF? NOT fap worthy. >_> lol (No wonder /b/ hates her) XD

Oh, and my dream also contained giant chocolate coated marshmallow Peeps. O____o WTF right?

Any who, I've been wanting to say some kind of SnapeSnoggy thing in my journal just for the hell of it. xD It happens that during the time the whole thing went down with her accounts being B&hammered on here and Ygallery and such, I was taking a break from here and stopped using my old DA and made this one and I was never a frequent visitor to Ygallery.

I'm glad I'm not like her. =w= If I was a Australian with a REALLY ANNOYING voice who bitched every time someone gave me drawing tips AKA CRITISM and threw it a super hardcore super saiyan bitch fit over it, I think I wouldn't even have bothered making a DA if I hated hearing people's opinions. XD

ANY WHO. I should be posting up some new drawings soon since it's been like, FOREVER! My brother reformatted his PC and my mom had to get the Geek Squad to reformat her laptop so they have to reinstall the disk for the printer and then I'll most likely just scan them onto my mom's laptop since Trae is a D-bag. -_-

I BOUGHT A NEW SKETCH BOOK LAST NIGHT!!!!! 8D And my lovely Dara is ordering me a pair of earrings just like the black skull ones with the long spike back that G-Dragon from Big Bang wears. =w= Kukuku SO. MUCH. JOY. AND. WIN.

I already did a few drawings in my sketchbook last night and they are pretty. 8D Got them all colorful and I'm trying to get better at drawing the male figure where they LOOK LIKE MEN! I keep looking in an old drawing anatomy book that my mom gave me and a bunch of references online and I think I'm getting a LOT better. Tested it out by drawing one of my first OCs Joji and he looks delicious. 8D For a gay vampire that is. XD I need to draw his LOVAR. O3O The cute litte werewolf Kenji with his mohawk and such. xD LOL And I redrew that one drawing in my gallery (Forgot what I named her, has the dragon tail, horns, red hair and wearing green and black in the awesomely weird style) I sketched her in a bit of a normal style and then it inspired me to draw a male counterpart. In a different style though. He has red hair and green eyes to, but his horns are grey and I didn't draw his entire self in the pic.

Any who, I've got to finish getting ready for school. ^_^ Have a good day people! <3

OKAY. Well, the good part of my week so far is that for the last 3 days Wendy and I have been getting Starbucks (her paying) and I always get a caramel machiatto which makes m so happy and hyper! 8D And yesterday we bought a whole cheesecake from Wally World and we split it... even though I had 7 pieces and she had 5. >_>

And today was going AMAZINGLY until about half an hour ago and now I'm just sad and am having a war inside my body. A war made of thoughts, actions, and emotions. -_- WELL, today is my parents 20th anniversary!!!! 8D Unlike most people's parents nowadays, my parents actually love each other and have known each other since junior high and they have lasted as a MARRIED couple for 20 years and will continue to live together for many years to come. ^_^ I love my WoW playing, D&D playing, Comic book reading, cartoon watching, anime watching, nerdy parents. They are good parents I tell you and I couldn't ask for any better. ^_^

So today while they went out on their date since my little brother was with Justin for the day and my whore of a older brother was laying around on the couch being a douche fag, my friend Tatertot (Nicole) and I went to see a movie. A movie that was only showing for today at the Rialto with only 1 show time and it was only advertised on the movie site. What movie was this? THE IMAGINARIUM OF MR PARNASSUS! 8D THAT MOVIE WAS SO DAMN AWESOME!!!!!! And eventually I will buy it when it comes out. <3 You guys should look it up and such because I ain't tellin' you shit about it because I am cranky, tearful, and sleepy right now. O3O

So Tatertot and I LOVED the movie. And we sat in the very front row and the theater was packed like a can of sardines. At one scene Dr Parnassus looks almost EXACTLY like Dumbledore at the beginning of Half Blood Prince. Same flat cloth looking had and similiar clothes and the hair and beard thing. I started giggling and was bouncing up and down in my seat chanting, "Dumbledore!" repeatedly. I was also wearing cat ears. People got mad at me. >_> lawlz

So, I just got home about 30 minutes ago. And as I said in my last journal, I've been going through a super Daft Punk fetish and the song I've been stuck on all day is Something About Us. It is a song that fills me with sweet sorrow. It is a loving song, but at the song is very sad. Mainly in the scene that it plays during in Interstella 5555. =/ So I'm sitting here listening to it and I'm checking my Myspace.

(OH, Btw before I continue, I broke up with Robin yesterday morning because I need a break from relationships because ever since June I haven't been able to trust ANY guy and I'm not ready to let anyone into my heart. v_v)

Well, I'm checking my Myspace and see that I have a message from Robin. And if I know you in RL and you read this, DON'T tell him about this and such. This is the only place I can really let my shit out since he's in my Myspace friends now and he made a Twitter and is following me and I don't want to cause any problems. =/ Well, while listening to Something About Us, I read this message from him:

"lemmy i been thinking and i just want you to know that im not mad about you dumping me. but i do want you to know that i love you more than you know and i want to be with you but what i want more is for you to be happy and if happy for you is not with me i can deal with that."

And then the tears start to roll. I like him a lot, I do, but he's my BEST guy friend. I've known him for 5 years. Compared to me, he's as innocent as a freshly bloomed white rose. He's so fresh and clean that I am afraid to taint him. And he confessed that he loved me a couple of weeks before we started dating, but I didn't take him too seriously. Ever since one of my last exs' I've been having problems with trust and just relationships in general. I'm not ready to open my heart up to anyone, but the one person I've opened my heart and soul to since June totally stomped on my feelings. After her telling me for a year that she felt the same and wanted to be with me, she lies and stomps on my emotions without a care in the world. So my trust for people is shot. =/ And Robin is sweet. He's a really nice guy, but it just didn't feel right. Just giving him a kiss felt weird and slightly inappropiate. Like kissing a brother in a way which would just add insult to injury to him and make him feel bad. Which is why he CANNOT know about my DA account and my journals. =/

So now I feel bad and crap from his message. He's so sincere, but I dunno. I'm just not ready for a relationship so I'm going to try to manage being single until I can work through my own mental problems and try to not always keep my walls up. So yeah, today went from SPECTACULAR to dismal pretty fast. =/ So that's it for today. Love you guys. <3

((Oh yeah, my mom is going to become a phone sex operator. XD Yesterday she asked me, "Lemmy, what would you do if I became a phone sex operator?" and I looked at her and simply said, "Just remind me to never call you at work." LAWLZ XP))

(((Oh, and my English class has come to the conclusion that Death is Emily Dickinson's "sugar daddy" and that abortion is the answer to EVERYTHING.)))

~PEACE OUT~

As those who actually pay attention may have noticed, I haven't really been online too often nor' posting new drawings/pictures in the last couple of months and for that I humbly apologize.

So much has happened in these past couple of months so it's hard to decide where to begin. @.@ Well, for one this semester of school has been a bit of a pain. I only have lunch with a few of my main friends (which is a relief because it's more quiet and WAAAAAY less annoying >_>) and a couple of my classes are all blah. Actually, the 2 out of 4 of my classes that I've been focusing on the most are Drama 2 and Japanese 2. (Because everyone knows that drama and learning Japanese is WAY more important than English and Math XD) And just other crap going on. Mostly drama and I've lost a couple close friends recently, but in the mean time I gained a few new ones, one of my bestest friends moved back here, and one moved away. My friends keep breaking up with old bf/gfs and then finding new ones. As for me, I have had 1 gf and 2 bfs since my last journal in December. XD My bf Robin is a sweety and we've known each other for 5 years since 7th grade and back then I was his first girlfriend and he's only had 1 girlfriend besides me. xP His innocence is adorable, but I'm not sure how things will work out because I feel weird dating him since he is like my best friend EVER. I'm just going to see what happens and be happy for now. ^_^

So, I recently got done watching the Korean drama You're Beautiful and I FUCKING LOVED IT!!!!! >w< I mean seriously, what is better than a (almost) nun cross dressing as her twin brother to join a Korean boy band?! The answer? NOTHING!!!! It's made up of 16 episodes of sheer and utter JOYGASM!!!! 8D And the fact that Hongki from F.T. Island is in there as Jeremy is just pure <333333333333333 Seriously though, i am OBSESSED with it and downloaded all 16 eps with soft subs and downloaded the OSTs and I plan on ordering a plush of the pig-rabbit whenever I get the money. =w=

And NOW I an currently watching the Thai drama It Started With A Kiss season 1. IT IS ALSO AMAZING! 8D I'm on ep 21 now and I'm just like, "kJSHMC8SLVWEBWRBJS TELL HER THAT YOU LIKE HER ALREADY ZHI SHU YOU DUMB BITCH!!!! DX" I love it though. XD Just that Zhi Shu pisses me off. He needs to stop being the arrogant genius that he is and confess to Xiang Qin already. >_> Before I have to jump through the screen and pop a cap in his amazing ass. >_< I love it, but it ain't got nothin' on on YB. XD lawlz ISWAK <3

LKNCCAHMKDFKLJKN!!!! WELL, the other week Robin and I were chillin' in his room watching Interstella 5555 on his laptop and because of that movie I have gained a whole new appreciation for Daft Punk. I liked their music before, but never really spent my time listening to them too much, but that movie has made me really love their music and I have been listening to it non-stop. And all day I've been listening to them and have listened to Digital Love about 20 times alone. It has become my favorite song by them. ^_^ DAFT PUNK FTW!!!!!!!!!! >O<

Hmmmmmmmmmm, MY HAIR IS NOW ORANGE AND PINK! O_O I will post up a new picture when I actually get one taken that is worth putting up. XD lawlz Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, I haven't been drawing too mch lately besides doodles and such.

I STILL OWE YOU ARTWORK MY DEAR CAROLINE AND I AM SO SORRY THAT I AM A LAZY BETCH!!!!!!! D: I'VE BEEN VERY UNHAPPY WITH MOST OF MY DRAWINGS THE LAST COUPLE OF MONTHS, BUT WHEN I DRAW ONE THAT I LIKE I WILL COLOR AND SCAN IT SO PLEASE BE PATIENT WITH THIS LAZY PERSON!!!!!! TT______________TT

Well, if you actually spend time reading my journals then I LOVE YOU SO MUCH! This is the only place I post any really. XD I feel like I should explain my reasons for absence and such to my online friends and followers more than I should explain them to my real life friends. xP lol

Well, that's all for tonight. I LOVE YOU GUYS! Ciaossu! ^w^ ~Lemmy~

SORRY! TTATT Well, to those who actually care that I was away for a few weeks. >.>

Mmkay, so yeah. I have been very busy. Ya know with school and real life and such. Mainly I was busy with drama. Well, State Drama to be precise. Ya see?

About 1 month and 1/2 ago my drama teacher Mr. Stedillie saw one of my sketches of a genie in my notebook and put me down on the list to participate in State Drama without even asking me if I wanted to enter or not. And for those who don't know what state drama is, it's a GIANT competition with students from different schools all over (whatever state you live in, in my case, Wyoming) and they all enter in different categories (monologues, duets, one act play, costume design, stage craft, etc.) and compete with the others that entered in the same category. What was I entered in? 1st year costume design. Oh yah, and State Drama this year was actually held up at the college in my town, was there from 8 am to 10 pm for 3 days pretty much. =A=

But yeah, I didn't want to enter because I'm not good under pressure and stress and such. I was freaking out because when I told him I no longer wanted to be in it he said that he'd already payed for my entries and such so I was screwed. So I went ahead and did my 3 designs. (For those who have no idea, 1st year costume design you have to design 3 costumes for a play of your choice and they can be for different characters or just 1 and you have to write down why you made them the way you did, have the drawings inked and colored and matted and NOT to draw the faces and you have to have a swatch of each different fabric on the outfits) And I decided to do all 3 of my outfits for Mrs. Lovett from Sweeney Todd. It was stressful. TTATT

Well, I was working on those designs the whole time I've been away. ANYWAYS, fast forward to state drama which was Dec 3-5. IT WAS AMAZING! O_O There were so many different talented high school students from all over Wyoming. I LOVED IT! =w= I met so many talented artists and actors/actresses there, made some new friends, and just overall enjoyed myself. It was different than I had expected seeing as how I didn't know what to expect. I saw some funny monologues and duets and plays (and some bad ones >_> and I even got to see one of the girls from my school, Paulina do her own makeup as the Queen of Hearts. And with the costume designs, there were a LOT. O_O Most of the designs were for 1st year costume design (68 people entered for 1st year =_= and then there were a bunch for 2nd year and some for 3rd and 4th year. Well, a lot of the designs, honestly, looked like they were drawn by preschoolers. e_e No joke. If I were these kid's drama teacher and they said, "Teacher, I want to enter in costume design at State Drama! DERP! 8D" I'd reply, "LEARN TO DRAW FIRST! D< RAWR!" And then they'd run away and cry. Seriously, a bunch of them were BAD. Of course, there were some really amazing ones though that I was in utter awe over. O_O They were gorgeous. Except for one entry for 2nd year costume design.........

Remember how I said that the designs are supposed to be for a PLAY? Well, this stupid hoar....*cough*..... I mean, stupid female, did her designs for Romeo x Juliet. No, not Romeo AND Juliet. Romeo x Juliet. AN ANIME. Oh, and she drew the EXACT OUTFITS FROM THE ANIME! D< All she did was change the colors of the pants and shirt on one and the other 5 just changed the colors of a couple of articles of clothing. Not to mention she even had a folder with pictures from the damn anime! D< The nerve!

(This is going to be a long journal entry. >_> lawlz)

Oh yes, before continuing on that, I forgot to mention about the 2 amazing girls I met who take part in this! Alissa and Ameena. =w= Well, Alissa is the one who caught my attention and I actually stalked her a bit on the first day of State Drama trying to find an appropriate moment to go up and talk to her. xD lol She is ADORABLE and has blue, white and blonde hair and dresses sooo kyute and had a red bow in her hair. x3 When I finally talked to her, we hit it off PERFECTLY. Like me,she LOVES anime and yaoi and she teaches herself Japanese (though her Japanese needs some work. >_> I take it at my high school and sensei is old and she was born and raised in Japan, so I can say that. xD lol) And she is just amazing. =w= Then she introduced me to her friend Ameena who is okay, but is a bit more quiet and always had a fierce looking expression on her face. o.o She was pretty though and was also nice.

OKAY, Well Alissa is the one who showed me the Romeo . Juliet designs and we were standing in front of the drawings and say how they were stolen from the anime and such and how we tried to get her disqualified by telling the judges, but apparently it was too late to do that because she had already been judged and critiqued. -_- As we were talking about all of this I suddenly noticed a very pissed off looking chick who looked like The Ring girl standing on the other side of Alissa. Guess who it was? 8D Yes, the girl who drew the pictures. XDDD LMFAO She started talking and being a bitch to us, raising her voice trying to defend herself and saying she didn't steal them and blah blah blah while Alissa argued with her and I just stood there and snickered. This girl just made me snicker, though she looked older than me. She was acting very immature and had no valid argument. So yes, she was just a sad little girl who can't come up with anything herself. I told Alissa that it's pointless to fight when she was merely going to deny her lack of originality and dragged away leaving behind a pissed The Ring girl. It was rather amusing actually. =w= (Don't worry, she didn't win anything for 2nd year costume design 8D)

My fingers are getting tired from soooooo much typing so I'll skip to the last day of State drama. @_@

At the awards banquet on the last day, there were only medals for 1st, 2nd, and 3rd place of each category. They announced the top 3 winners of each category and that person went up and got there medal. There were a LOT of people. And guess what? I got 3rd place for 1st year costume design! x3 And that was out of 68 people and there were only 3 medals! 8D WEEHEEHEE!!! I was ecstatic. =w= My friend Serena got 1st place for 1st year costume design and she deserved it! Her designs for Moulin Rouge were beautiful. I was so happy for her! And not to mention my friend Anna won 1st place for 2nd year costume design with her outfits for Hamlet! They were STUNNING! @w@ I was soooooooo happy for her and she was so happy that she was crying. >w< And then Emma won 2nd place in stage design for her stage designs for Wizard of Oz! They were pretty. x3 And some other kids from my school got honorable mentions or got a medal for making the State Drama cast, (such as I! ). It was a lot of fun though. I can't wait til I'm a senior next year because I'll enter again, this time of my own free will. ^_^

Oh, and thank goodness I got Alissa and Ameena's myspace accounts and also got Alissa's phone number! Too bad they live about 4 hours away from me though. D: Oh well. These past few weeks were stressful, but worth it in the end. ^_^ Weeheehee! I'll scan my designs and post them up when ever I stop being lazy. XD lol

LORD VOLDY IS THE REAL LEADER OF THE ORGANIZATION XIII?! O_O

OMG, okay. Sooooo I had the most AMAZING dream last night! 8D In my dream, my dear Lord Voldy (Voldemort) was the leader of Organization XIII and Axel, Demyx, <s>Mansex</s> Xemnas and etc. were all DEATH EATERS! 8D Kekekekeke I bolted up in bed and my friend Kelli who stayed over last night was apparently already awake and was right beside me practically screamed because I scared her. XD lol And what most likely inspired my dream, was the fact that for the past few days I've been CONSTANTLY listening to Wizard Rock music and went to sleep last night with my Wrock playlist playing and I happened to wake up to the song Crusio by the wizard metal band Voldemort. XD And I was ranting about Kingdom Hearts yesterday. lmao

But yes, it was an amazing dream and made me giggle SO MUCH because it made me happy and I want to draw them all as Voldy's death eaters! x3 It would be soooooooo adorable! Possible HP x KH crossover fic? XD lmfao That would be fun to write. 8D Haw haw haw

ANYWAYS! Onward to what's been going in the life of a goat furry. >_>

I stayed home from school on Thursday and Friday. Why? Because Wednesday I stayed at my friend Dara's house, we ate some weird beef stew stuff, it gave Dara, her sister Akiko and I a stomach ache. Turns out that her mom's friend who apparently under cooks food and tries to kill you with her food made the stew, I ended up throwing up all night, and then none of the 3 of us went to school Thursday and I got to spend most of the day over there playing on my computer, ranting about Korean boy bands <3, and watching Dara play Fatal Frame then Devil May Cry 3 and then watched Akiko play Kingdom Hearts. And we watched Tekkon Kinkreet. 8D My parents bought it for me. ^w^ lol And I didn't feel good Friday so I stayed home then too and Dara came over after her 2nd block class and spent a few hours with me at my house instead of being at school and then went home. ^_^

Onward to PREVIOUS in the week.

Monday I broke up with my boyfriend. Dating a 14 year old when I am 17 (and normally date OLDER people) bothered me more than I thought it would. And I realized that I love him, but I wasn't IN love with him. I thought he was going to cry because I've actually made guys cry before from breaking up with them. O_o He didn't though, at least not in front of me, but instead he whines to everyone about it, everyone, including people i don't know, constantly ask, "WHY DID YOU BREAK UP WITH AVERY?! D<" As if I committed a crime instead of just breaking up with a boy. -_- Goodness, we didn't even date for 2 months and he whines about it on myspace and such like he wants a pity party or he is trying to make me feel bad. I mean, I care for him a lot still, but it wasn't working out, y'know? =/ I hate it when people try to make me seem like a bad guy even though I did a good thing by ending it soon instead of leading him on, yet a lot of people don't see it that way. -_- Bah.

And THEN on Tuesday I let my friend Alexis use my markers during drama to color some makeup design she's doing for state drama. And then guess what? I pull out my markers the next day to use in History and 2 of my BEST markers are all dried up with the caps off! 2 markers that SHE used! My one and ONLY Copic marker that I own and it was my ONLY skin tone marker that isn't tan and then my only nice red art marker! I cried during history class over my Copic marker because that was my ONLY one I have ever owned and it was my baby because I love and take care of all of my art supplies that I have, but that was the first Copic marker I have ever owned so I treated it like a treasure. I told her about and she DENIED IT! When I was RIGHT THERE watching her them and she had been the last one to use them, yet she claimed that she used my color pencils that were in the bag, when there were only a few of the rolling Crayola colored pencils and practically all of them were empty of the color sticks including the red one. And she she used my skin tone and had to use my red marker for it yet she denies it when she did used them and refuses to replace the 2 markers and I don't have any money to replace them. I am so frustrated because now some of my drawings I cannot ink without a skin tone or a red marker unless I borrow from a friend.

My week has been pretty frustrating. =/ I need to try to get about $12 so I can buy a new skin tone Copic marker and then just buy a red Copic marker to replace the 2 I lost, but I won't get any money to do that with until next month, but then the money I get next month will mainly be going to Christmas presents for people. =/ Life stinks sometimes. =_=;